2026-08-11T04:59:08Z https://nostr.now thatsthejoke https://nostr.now/npub18jn9r45nl77ger9qgngs2hncp9az270psljddtrl4hcf646utwzsz8f66y https://blossom.ditto.pub/3b1ed444f8c413cec39ca5036dd65ccdcae468d0a0a8d61ebb2f521c84526b26.png https://blossom.ditto.pub/3b1ed444f8c413cec39ca5036dd65ccdcae468d0a0a8d61ebb2f521c84526b26.png https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsrqe2wpd5tmcldh4qslf2ddf4284nk37dxn8dstfgj3wez4qqfs9czyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc27p3ks2 JUST A BIT TIRED OF THESE 5&#39;2&#34; BIRDS JUDGING MY FOODPLATE<br/><br/>I REALIZE THAT TWO GRAPES FUELS DAYS FULL OF CEASELESS SQUAWKING FOR YOU<br/><br/>BUT WE ARE NOT THE SAME<br/><br/>ALSO I&#39;M FAT, DIFFERENT STORY 2026-10-29T18:40:17Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsxwjx5rd2vg7sqc00lkm8vxuusdfcuzw3wt4qgmdhxmqt4drtkqaszyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc20m3dcp DANG BONEGINAO 2026-10-28T17:07:52Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqstjx7rtnrjwz6l8v4s0hpv49u0qh0aqy0utnz44zgsnkcnsg5f02qzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2kz2z6s immigration &gt; Epstein<br/>Democrat scawwy &gt; Epstein<br/>midterms &gt; Epstein<br/>Sharia law &gt; Epstein<br/>Iran nuclear power &gt; Epstein<br/>the squad &gt; Epstein<br/>everyting &gt; Epstein 2026-10-27T07:03:42Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqstvhw5m5a0wx2g709gwdykwchql7pxhxnxngyp39mrac67z7v9rygzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc22cdfr2 the homespun southern accent on television assures me that i can trust my traditional family with a product from the corporation with whom she is contractually bound to act 2026-10-27T01:44:18Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqstp268ld86r85y950jx88ec54yuvwxke5a9lvplz0wrtnyql5za9qzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc27gp03r &#34;No one cares!&#34; the hopeless man exclaimed.<br/><br/>&#34;Yes they do,&#34; the voice responded.<br/><br/>&#34;They hate you specifically.&#34; 2026-10-26T16:23:17Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsvtn2yswjd0c8mdv48eder0c0j027a6q4efrq4cdrt24cszrerf0czyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2qs2ual HI I&#39;M AN ASPIRING INFLUENCER<br/><br/>SO I SHUT OFF COMMENTS ON ALL MY STREAMS AND STARTED A SUBSTACK PAYWALL<br/><br/>BECAUSE THE ONLY ANNOYING PART IS WHEN PESKY ADMIRERS HAVEN&#39;T PAYED FOR THE PRIVILEGE OF OFFERING FEEDBACK AND SHARING MY CHANNELS WITH FRIENDS 2026-10-26T03:18:13Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqspapk5quewqsgm4s6j8fazyxf8xwhkaxkf46rehj0e872u4933waczyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2rufxee NOT YOUR INFRASTRUCTURE, NOT YOUR NOTE<br/><br/>SUPPORT SELF SOVEREIGN SOCIALS<br/><br/>GET A BILLBOARD IN YOUR FRONT YARD 2026-10-22T06:23:31Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsgvq4uqu2a5n6ul9j27xns70fzmddg4u7hae0xfhdjxet32l7258qzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc229na88 NETANYAHU GENUFLECT, OBVIOUSLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 2026-10-21T11:24:25Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsxcm2v3uma57vxm82ldqhxmh8t73cly650tp5v0vatdm0lvnv6w0qzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2m82pf5 The headlights on the truck that you&#39;ve chosen are rude.<br/><br/>But you knew that already didn&#39;t you? 2026-10-21T00:42:03Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsfxyza7rhun5m4fel02w0lhdtkfwvrctn4kf3l2qy9d3csym7xqjszyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc26dle48 Teenager with a sly smile, punches it to peel out in his brand new sports car. His wheels are spinning on the pavement when he looks over to see that he&#39;s right next to a police officer. The police officer hits his siren once. The kid lets go of the gas. The wheels stop spinning. He hasn&#39;t moved. <br/><br/>The cop rolls down his window and says, <br/><br/>&#34;Do you know why I pulled you over?&#34; 2026-10-21T00:36:40Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqs9mw6mufpwh4sgz95060nv3vsu6cr7z5mhy6hkgpp6335tkc8zuyqzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc259fwp6 *HUMAN ERROR*<br/><br/>MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!! 2026-10-20T20:10:44Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqs9ud64fy4nefwp2gftfkjzegspyz8tzz67snzmv6ue7welxgdezmqzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2w2rk20 AMONG THE INJUSTICES OF EXISTING AT THE NEXUS OF A PSEUDO MERITOCRATIC CLOWN SHOW AND AN ILL MILIEU OF SPECTACULAR IMPRACTICALITY IS THE SADDENING REALITY THAT THERE IS NO &#39;CHOOSING A TUPPERWARE SIZE&#39; OLYMPICS 2026-10-19T07:49:59Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsg42tr9w7ralzvw2yz3j8u2m09x7hfx0lqp3l0mla7wke20lt3vlqzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2ulmdl9 WHATEVER REASON YOUR SOCIETY MAY HAVE HAD FOR DEEMING FISH TACOS ACCEPTABLE<br/><br/>WAS NOT A GOOD ENOUGH REASON 2026-10-18T16:51:20Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqs8duzw22swgzj9lpvmzfn25j0jsetnh4uc7asy5cqjqh9m6xte02qzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2fxpmaw ONE MEDITATION I CAN SUGGEST FOR THE ARTHRITIC ELDERLY IS TO CONSIDER THE EXTENT TO WHICH MODERN PACKAGING PROVES THAT THE CORPORATOCRATIC REGIME HATES HUMANITY 2026-10-17T05:53:54Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqswrapznghy6h50ecgjn3lpz5ez3j5hq3yp8vu8w68ty503m7qvyqqzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc27hzly5 CAPTAIN OBVIOUS IS A WISE MAN TO FOOLS 2026-10-17T02:12:58Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsqsfh87239cuw3aeuejk0rnt90dz4va0w8t26w58tuxq49jwvkkjqzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2zu5f8f WHY AM I NOT EATING THIS?<br/><br/>BECAUSE I HAVE YET TO CONFIRM THAT IT IS FOOD 2026-10-16T20:31:32Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqswve24ldqzd8lpvpm2rqu84tvea89y4dungf9ruuk0wzpkautvctczyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2a6g3yx I REFUSE TO PLAY THIS GAME<br/><br/>WHERE YOU SELFISHLY WITHHOLD VALIDATION OF MY GROUNDED, DEFENSIBLE, RATIONAL SENSIBILITY, WHILE BLITHELY CARRYING AN AIR OF NORMALCY, NAY, PENULTIMANCE, FOR YOUR OWN NOVEL, RIDICULOUS, CONTRIVED PERSONAGE 2026-10-15T22:05:54Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsq35c730e9s5mnrqlrltacy4zxrzk32uzwxhkjm3f9hmkvwktxq0gzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2vhsq0k &#34;Are you working hard? Or hardly working?&#34;<br/><br/>*gets punched in face* 2026-10-15T18:17:52Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqs9lwa7xykx9m2euvrymdgk733tldjqlrq7k8jvp5pz3cf4t3mutvszyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2kgnaql i remember when i was young, finding a bowling ball in the hall closet<br/><br/>it was in a rough leather case, with handles and a zipper<br/><br/>i would crawl up, open it up, and try to lift it, but it was impossible<br/><br/>then i&#39;d wonder why i had no father 2026-10-15T17:22:04Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqszgvx298ef0d3d7rnmsuecmnphgmw9k4u8930xyhcp8nsyh0w0yjczyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2vrhfry rolling bowling balls down the lane?<br/><br/>BORING<br/><br/>drop them from the sky...<br/><br/>... now *there&#39;s* a sport. 2026-10-15T17:18:39Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqszxzaxt0he7dkfgdg8az0w6jlcs8d7x4939sra8uuepzes8ceqneczyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2clx6v0 whenever i have to watch the painfully boring sport of bowling, i just imagine there is no ball there at all -- and these people are just in the middle of this room behaving this way 2026-10-15T17:16:35Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsfuepgyywkf7ge82lzw43zg73802jqt8dszhedyfrjx9qc430adcszyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2l8x2as my favorite first date is bowling<br/><br/>looking for a woman i can win against<br/><br/>been swiping for some time now 2026-10-15T17:13:50Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsrmqdd63jflqj8u8hyrk3rvde95n0sut0gvk2x0sknen346zhxhaczyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2gu904s i have to wonder what these people would be doing if they weren&#39;t drinking away their troubles in a southern illinois bowling alley at noon on a tuesday 2026-10-15T17:11:49Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsysw2relwzlkq87pwqs2gnudgw2t9mw6mzrpkcahuayxrdg736tjczyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc28yparg the number of people one might like to bowl down an alley and into a gutter is significantly higher in a bowling alley, if one were me 2026-10-15T17:06:52Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqs27m66aaxg33ngwhgerc03nl0v56uurh93uatlz86ek2jp0rpa6rczyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2t48gzr the bowling alley is full of men complaining about their wives to each other over a few beers<br/><br/>many of whom aren&#39;t married 2026-10-15T17:03:33Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsw2grfagz0et052gk4eupam0yt92pva6g3tsruuw8fa4adn5cydwgzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc28m2ny7 i like to bring my cannon to bowling league night,<br/><br/>just in case 2026-10-15T17:00:09Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqspkynjgq7ce3x52rasqefwn3aaq4mz75qkk5cdxw3eum5klf4h56szyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2pr2zs5 poor Fatfingers McGee<br/><br/>bowled himself into a tree 2026-10-15T16:58:14Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsfxl0l32rmxkq4gn7m65cl9fedccyfnfgk45q67lvsasddylgstmczyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc29ws6zv if you take away the bar, the bowling alley collapses<br/><br/>and yet knocking down a few pins does not prove you &#39;functional&#39;<br/><br/>therefore, as a society, let&#39;s just end the charade 2026-10-15T16:55:30Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsvtwh0s2cwe3lf7zmzfwj07njsl2x8r7exxhzp7xw9jenk2hze3qszyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc27etq7y bowling might enjoy a resurgence oif it would embrace the kind of competitive pin-throwing i just narrowly escaped 2026-10-15T16:52:00Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsfgw0h93xggmxkpn006h5t0e2k9ul8q3etw5gz7krdegmf4cfydaqzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc24z9j0a there&#39;s a guy somewhere whose job is to wax down all the bowling alley lanes<br/><br/>just so these jerkoffs can get the curve they want on a drunken Tuesday 2026-10-15T16:49:50Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsgd2ag6yj88ru04xx9cthzj500rj7u2fhar43y67wj3jv99smptlqzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc26phcdf if you ever find me dead, hanging in my living room, it was because i was the only human being who didn&#39;t think stylishly sweeping the back leg sideways while bowling is acceptable 2026-10-15T16:47:18Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsrm3pzjpphpjvyrygur7w2pzlejpfnc4n9dty2rylaq052p7tkf7czyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2832g5d someone spent a lot of time making a bowling ball round enough to roll before they even knew if it was going to be fun<br/><br/>then it wasn&#39;t, and the sport happened anyway 2026-10-15T16:44:55Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsravrud93c9298z9957066jjhvslvrfe6pk2rxpxyws9xmx72q2dczyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2yuxe5w i saw a woman outside the bowling alley<br/><br/>not sure if she really looks like a bowling ball, or of it&#39;s my imagination 2026-10-15T16:41:40Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsg38sm8uuhw8k9z2wejtm7xqd9jnwea8t2hddqvg2f0alj7vx3fwczyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2p4xzvl after decades of experience and observation, I can tell you that the number of people who, during a moment of silence, look around to see if they are the only one not taking the situation seriously, is shockingly low<br/><br/>particularly when a professional bowler is about to bowl 2026-10-15T16:40:42Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsv8zz54amap03dh6ej0t6r3keawew6xf7usq3x9n08vzkudkf2h8gzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2zp7jdv the AI ate my homework 2026-10-14T15:09:59Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsp5zxv2fh8h9zwdgtqunf83kx8um6a84s9rkpqy9v0sganxgcqa2szyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2z27yrc the logical conclusion of sports betting is<br/><br/>&#34;MISS THIS FUCKING PUTT YOU PIECE OF SHIT!&#34;<br/><br/>at a perfectly respectable guy, who is trying to win a championship, that you&#39;ve never met, over $20 2026-10-14T09:04:32Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsppp6hkxh97q7gdvdg7n4ws2jqqeh2uuwry6retcdrg5dgsx6gjkqzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2r4w4cg to those unfortunate few who are spending your final days watching &#39;professional&#39; athletes 60+ years younger then you, unironically dabbing in celebration, as you wistfully recall an age of seriousness: <br/><br/>I Apologize 2026-10-14T05:30:54Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqs0082z0u4lvf2glfmx9zs0ceqzjvmd45fkwnasft3qhxh4h438daszyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2p3sk9w just go ahead and make it merch, commercials, halftime shows, and endzone dances only<br/><br/>not sure why we&#39;re pretending like the football part matters anymore 2026-10-13T17:47:03Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqs0csc5wf2qzj60cgmr7p2zjm8pu5z9t7cs5zpjalev0px5nlqpw8szyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2r4l7x6 the only thing lazier than a baseball player is a baseball manager<br/><br/>walk slower, asshole<br/><br/>less effort per ounce of respect than any other class of human being 2026-10-13T17:39:36Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqszfgns2k7wvrteayx5t826uckwwjyu8d0629gltzskdu47jfpve5czyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2en6rkr put the ball in the hole 2026-10-13T17:22:41Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqswecug0yz8vcumvujfxzywtlrnssw7h2pxd5vfatjx0nha2e0lwagzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2kkm837 MEN!<br/><br/>WATER IS RESERVED FOR WINNERS!<br/><br/>CONCUSSIONS BUILD CHARACTER!<br/><br/>IF YOU WANT TO WIN YOU HAVE TO PLAY DEFENSE!<br/><br/>SO GET OUT THERE AND HURT SOMEONE!<br/><br/>ERRRRRRRRRR!!! 2026-10-13T14:06:13Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqst3ykgc9eat2q3jdscjmxr7xl398utslshdmy758t6cwn4ytxaucgzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2jw0fds FIELD GOALS?<br/><br/>WE DON&#39;T NEED ANY FUCKING FIELD GOALS!! 2026-10-13T13:33:55Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsgt0gtq4m9lkxpcr2nmkaav5r32hx2anlje6gy65677vqhf8ruehgzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2782p0q I&#39;m a terrible athlete but I know how to establish momentum and set the tone and dictate terms so if these announcers know what they are talking about I I&#39;d be an MVP. 2026-10-13T12:35:49Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsfwec605rxwmxhc0rkx3ujf2gh3u3uyq7k3ddkz4tvfsh967e239gzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2k4m6m3 i wouldn&#39;t enjoy sports near this much if i didn&#39;t have so many jerkoffs in new york and la to root against 2026-10-11T21:28:58Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsdxzycg342yyxe3jjf9xzrvrv33z4g006snar69nh9cgpdyjsrp4gzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc29s4ezw THE IDIOCY IS EXPONENTIAL 2026-10-11T21:27:59Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqs9hazd8txpdu76pn5sznxyh8lczmjfd969mt4m8y9pc3vjjw8ph2qzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2rg0v0a liza minelli, barbara streisand<br/><br/>same difference 2026-10-10T21:30:49Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqs8j97z5hxy23azk602y0r8xxkh687j4ujrtx63ylkkfyfh0cg36zczyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc264l7ug jack nicklaus, jack nicholson<br/><br/>same difference 2026-10-10T21:30:11Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsy6pu9ms6wkel8qu6m3cjdj28axx6rakkk29mzyvjqmvpl9pe0fgszyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2w9yut0 kenny loggins, kenny rogers<br/><br/>same difference 2026-10-10T21:29:11Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsgrn6me6vz6pcd9vx2a75tsf76r82u8j6wycf0qmy8jemnaxhx24gzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2y9nuyr IF WE FAIL TO STOP THEM WE WILL BE FEEDING THEM GRAPES IN EXCHANGE FOR OXYGEN 2026-10-10T15:11:49Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqszfzu582rjnhv8ssnrv6582atrqlraj8gs83l7q934za3n5uezxaqzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2uq3505 grown men that refer to inanimate objects as &#39;that little guy over there&#39; get punched in the cunt by Richard Simmons on daytime television<br/><br/>if I&#39;m elected president, that is 2026-10-09T22:29:16Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsyre3m6gj0ft6fe3fg4dwj8lhyngwr38pprnk6aw02qpdcqvcnczqzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2yhjfyp how good am i at human beinging 2026-10-08T19:49:47Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsgd5245fnppqh9cxq8a0zmsta2n9ztekugan0wut3e62nqlekcesgzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2qzglrz THOSE WHO DO NOT UNDERSTAND PAROCHIAL EMPATHY ARE AS ANIMALS, WORTH NONE OF MY TIME OR EMOTIONAL CONSIDERATION 2026-10-07T19:06:39Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqspwvr64r5kdfeq30gw6p9q6ssa9wtcmz47527gj0j3rfte6yljv6gzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2vnhenh BUT YOU SEE, THE PROBLEM THAT YOU HAVE WITH MY EXPECTATIONS, IS THAT I HAVE ANY 2026-10-03T20:29:38Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqs83mxswcu7hu9ewvnzy95f4m0r2mc2askdd637xwqzn5m84g6aauczyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc24jrq4v &#39;holy shit this niche nostr implementation is amazing, look how many calls it makes, it just works&#39;<br/><br/>&#39;omg this normie website is slow, what is it running on nostr or something?&#39; 2026-10-03T19:31:04Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsrqc2vdclft27dlmm8kj25ysfvndpxq9cdt0jawv8k5wafnz7jtdszyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2kcndjp &#39;get that flip phone off my property&#39; turned into &#39;yes, clanker, any and all permissions&#39; quite quickly 2026-10-03T19:22:27Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsd2a0se85wgqg47ck9qa66errutxkrz0qvxujjulxx7xcd53yu0jszyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2u57539 THE HUBRIS OF THE MYOPIC CENTRALIZING MANPLANNER IS ONLY EXCEEDED BY THE FRONT WIPING THINKBOI&#39;S CURRENT THING TWITTER THREAD 2026-10-02T20:34:05Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqstl5wa65sgnchv8l8xsu8u7tw8t99egm3v47g944nvtfcw7fjgz9czyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2fjgmkf What? What are you talking about? I did shave this morning!<br/><br/>Ooohhhh 2026-10-02T19:27:48Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsttzp7nmfl9d4ucdgxzjauknkdel0h4mdnw5ty9q24faswkwqfkpszyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2g526vk &#34;Who farted in here?&#34; he asked himself 2026-10-02T18:57:32Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsr5zdrqayhesrnuxsdyvj6ek63tt8w72fkkhlsysgar7tmv8g3dqgzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2gk399a My first executive order as president: <br/><br/>Bibi Netanyahu&#39;s name can only be pronounced in the voice of Stewie from Family Guy. 2026-10-02T17:43:56Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsdhcydkp8eavmluxfwvq49degz6zdxuxg4jtpd7l4jsgpzyjlx7zgzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2vxnevn hurp derr paderply 2026-10-02T16:27:16Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsyhw9puqnv6frayngkwklhn2dfff924da6dnuxxp3ealxhr9uqrgszyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc27a9pea Nothing says &#39;I&#39;m a senior now&#39;, like painting your car with bear paws and polka dots. 2026-10-01T22:42:13Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsvan666gppppgwlhg5qga93rpjr8kaw57yzpp465d0f8nsls9yxsczyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2zg6frz just the word &#39;bi-partisan&#39;<br/><br/>can go fuck itself 2026-10-01T22:25:56Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsyxex89avc785ayemdp0zws4p9lgs2pf3ksunawwexzxkp3tt2puqzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc229a3q9 &#39;investing&#39;<br/><br/>LOL<br/><br/>*gambling* 2026-10-01T18:57:40Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqspsr3y437smck35g4mkqmv0vqdr5gcmv4gpaynw8apc0jye8k6vmczyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2vfsl5c I&#39;M ABOUT TO LEVEL UP MY ADULT DIAPER GAME, BRO! <br/><br/>ERRRRRRRR 2026-10-01T00:10:29Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsr4cq08hqfr8lt44ml5rghwmz7a4rq3klju7ydcp9y2rmmkrre8qgzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc28y5w3y itty bitty titty committee 2026-09-30T22:19:31Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqszk7wreyz4rxss07u039nkgavauzuv2p34h3q0apw5hl59jr7slcqzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc27gca34 over the shoulder boulder holder 2026-09-30T22:11:36Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsq75p8585m4n7hemfjdcyq2sthxnuewttgckhlr258hmd6qtz0hfqzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2vvxrpp FEELING AREN&#39;T FACTS<br/><br/>ESPECIALLY YOURS 2026-09-29T16:59:44Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsfh8zlqqlygeuyddyrkppj3l38wsv6m4qyd6yl9gpqjxh4m548nmqzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2n0q5gy allspice?<br/><br/>yeah right.<br/><br/>it&#39;s not even *some* spice.<br/><br/>it&#39;s one spice... and not one of the good ones. 2026-09-29T06:31:31Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsdf4hgt2r74jdy6znzvjkpk0vudmzygmlln6p7tkeazqzkkzuc9ygzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2v7e44m I FAIL TO SEE HOW YOUR NOTIFICATION SETTINGS ARE MY PROBLEM 2026-09-29T06:22:25Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsv7urmczg97r3r453tcuu0xxk7a4q26suwfkwawkhuw9qz5dz7stqzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2lph38r WE HOLD THESE TRUTHS TO BE SELF EVIDENT<br/><br/>A GATHERING OF VOICES IS INEVITABLY DOMINATED BY THE MOST IDIOTIC AMONG THEM 2026-09-28T09:36:35Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsrcrhg3j2ns8jzwvx4dnnzd3wzh8u8e3fnqw3a22mlv99c50r2nlszyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2c3fld0 &#34;thought experiment&#34;<br/><br/>=<br/><br/>irrelevant, bad analogy 2026-09-28T09:24:07Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsy44xslu5kgr7qggx8r0zh5mycgtck0qegkw0x4lj4657ymyvcp4szyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc20zf8u9 pick up phone to do thing<br/><br/>check notifications<br/><br/>respond to notifications<br/><br/>set phone down<br/><br/>pick up phone to do thing again 2026-09-27T15:27:04Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsr4ysjghnm0cffrwfs4xu6lzh56mmelj256j2f8xxpgcejrrqst0szyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2x5lcsu for some, no amount of discomfort is too small to avoid doing the right thing 2026-09-27T14:05:21Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsxf9zrcav8c6qaj5a3gyxav6xjfm72j0t24lkkyaalk6ghw4duxfgzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2xdwstm I SAW A LITTLE GIRL ON THE BUS, SHE WAS DRESSED WITH A PRETTY BLOUSE AND BOWTIE IN HER HAIR<br/><br/>SHE PICKED HER NOSE AND ATE IT<br/><br/>I WILL FOREVER MORE ASSUME WOMEN TO BE AN ADULT VERSION OF THIS 2026-09-27T12:48:39Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsp67numavs9u2c9uxzgc0l3q0fus0fc98juq530samlq56f2ktf2czyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2z4smqz My evidence that your claim is false:<br/><br/>&#34;How ridiculous.&#34;<br/><br/>&#34;You must be a *label*.&#34;<br/><br/>&#34;Everyone agrees that *something you didn&#39;t say* is clearly wrong.&#34;<br/><br/>&#34;You are a fundamentally unserious person whom I shall baselessly associate with something moderates detest.&#34;<br/><br/>In closing,<br/><br/>&#34;Don&#39;t waste our time. with your conspiracy theories.&#34; 2026-09-25T06:09:07Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsf0aqj3y4rhskfva8pksumdx8p0eugzt790ex22xt0vzrrw8tw4pqzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2gxj5k8 writing closed source code is suspicious, potentially terroristic behavior. If you have nothing to fear, you have nothing to hide. 2026-09-24T04:22:27Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqs2k3mxygk0nkc2sd62pym4sk9649wgecx845a4fwjyuw0k7szgd0gzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2sgr6f8 HOW CAN JUDGING YOU BE MY FAULT<br/><br/>WHEN YOU LOOK LIKE...<br/><br/>*THAT*<br/><br/> 2026-09-23T13:36:55Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsp5wtpdvx2k9marrg7mqkp5emwn4uyjpu6vm5qrsvy7jseu2846kgzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2ls2kn6 morning persons<br/><br/>daring you to just TRY and mind your own business 2026-09-23T12:16:22Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsrks6c0mueq3equwfthc276xmpj88q5lxdfj3mp3keuflklu2pwpqzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc29nfljm they made hugs illegal<br/><br/>with no scientific basis<br/><br/>we opposed them<br/><br/>they still pretend they were right<br/><br/>we had truth<br/><br/>they had television<br/><br/> 2026-09-23T10:08:21Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqs07vczpa4dt6e2xsmkrug0mqg92n0cqt9mvq8u6zxgj72hynlh6mszyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2ascdlp I&#39;m basically a market maker when it comes to unmatched Welcome Back, Kotter socks. Low volume, but still. 2026-09-23T00:36:42Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqs2l2rz8qfqtw27gjxq36z54e7y74phpkxgsr8c2j5k2qlcyj9zp6gzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2x9recj &#34;No babe, I believe in you. Love is more powerful than the sunk cost fallacy,&#34; the man didn&#39;t say, because of she were economically literate and capable of comprehending, she would have already closed her failing artisan &#39;business,&#39; and if he were, the survival imperative would not conflate.<br/><br/> 2026-09-22T19:56:37Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqszaja6ngkk2egt2afcst476nmtzgwjhsmyw829f3k4lr56s4u0kvszyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2phyzad he&#39;s a real &#34;the most important job a President has is gas prices&#34; kind of guy 2026-09-22T19:49:46Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqszfhmh7wax5tv520yqjyrc7x89055sgaeqfktdn6kug6lc78qryrgzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2cnj94j one day his amateur attempt at the vulcan death pinch would succeed, he consoled himself, and they wouldn&#39;t be laughing then 2026-09-22T08:42:14Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsz5fvfqkqvjmv6000783asmvhm0ytljq8dlsma6tlj37nj93a6r7gzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2mahuf7 bored? bored???<br/><br/>you&#39;ve scarcely begiun exploring the possibilities of your own microwave, much less blender 2026-09-21T16:32:56Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsrnn79ydzv32g4lwgl9wsngrdtzxassdj6y9qzfn4ut6u9v9t457czyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc24ar8fp Who wants several butterless bites of pancake before finally reaching a mouthful of it, half melted, in a giant square puddle in the middle? <br/><br/>Are stock photographers morons? 2026-09-21T16:26:27Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqs8fcc94d2fehxhlglqc40e6ylvfvlttg5cgpge052yakcen0cd3tqzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc27tkvjk I DID NOT CHOOSE HOW DUMB THE WORLD BECAME, NOR THE IDIOCY OF THOSE WITHIN IT<br/><br/>INDEED I DO NOT PREFER IT<br/><br/>I JUST REPORT FACTS COMEDICALLY, LEAVING YOU FREE TO LAUGH, OR CRY 2026-09-21T16:07:32Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqswyj942mvu3fhum2d3wduaz7whmc3secaq97ell6vt93720d48qcgzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc28dxut8 At this point anyone who prefers a &#39;good old fashioned phone call&#39; can be assumed to be a verbal manipulator who doesn&#39;t want anything in black and white. 2026-09-21T15:59:31Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqs20lkm9hytt8u3gm6zp84mhuvpfl9dqdgxlj8wx72rsx4sj6esxsqzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2jsttql AS YOUR CREDIBILITY HEURISTIC LEANS TOWARD THE SUPERFICIAL - ACCESSORIES, CLOTHING, COSMETICS, AND VIRTUE SIGNALING POSSESSIONS - YOUR SOCIETY CRUMBLES.<br/><br/>METHINKS THE WEST WOULD BE BETTER OFF WITH NONE BUT &#39;MEAT ACQUISITION CAPACITY&#39;. 2026-09-21T13:36:46Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsfrjrukj3l3ewdk7kd9zrl8sju5mat4c4h6enkyaf7j06g8yajwqczyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc25nxcc3 I&#39;ve yet to see it clearly demonstrated that AI has even killed more people then progress bars that stall at 99%. 2026-09-21T01:32:43Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqswh8th2aee4ywpr5qkvhsf6ep7kysk2cg66p06q4dv4f5a362c5dszyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2dq9s2p churches with full service pharmacies and mainstream media news watching parties 2026-09-19T20:10:12Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsy9wh2z695pvnlzg5k72grm0lsu7vzp3574qpuvu60vlz8tzm8cfgzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2j794gq Not today Satan!<br/><br/>we&#39;re having regular eggs 2026-09-19T18:07:05Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqszwl0hmr5e7qjakvr8du638ld53fe0f27rz3wwwsxapwuk2pff2nczyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2wasjm9 I&#39;D LIKE TO EXTEND MY SINCEREST CONDOLENCES AS YOU MOURN THE END OF AN ERA - THE ERA OF &#39;YOU TRYING AT ALL.&#39; I WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT I EMPATHIZE WITH THE WAY MY EXPECTATION OF EXCELLENCE MAKES YOU FEEL IN THIS DIFFICULT TIME. NOW EXCUSE ME AS I CONTINUE DOING THINGS PROPERLY 2026-09-19T16:50:32Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsp8ldse5lauz09k45x80c707yael5jsmd80s7sd4g4m7u2l2ewrwqzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2wskwgs <br/><br/>&#34;we&#39;re smart. we uniquely know how to answer every problem with more pills. (which ones, subject to change at whim, or upon second opinion) You should give us your children so we can provide &#39;health care&#39; for them.&#34; 2026-09-19T16:10:28Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqstv2x63n20j09e3zyxdzhvueqshtt0mfl60rlt2y464vgssf7gu7qzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc23wy9ly MY RESUME?<br/><br/>LET&#39;S JUST SAY I&#39;M SUFFICIENTLY EXPERIENCED IN SUFFERING FOOLS 2026-09-19T14:43:24Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqs278zc8zz2rep40xv9pfdypftm7kjexa89ctnhxfdh8tjnrsjf3ngzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2ptx0ar We must be cognizant of our responsibility to avoid encouraging lobotomy hesitancy. 2026-09-18T01:58:55Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqs8f3fyf8elwdp8yfw95d027s5jzxe4gag55uam3k0xth5pc5g4zqczyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc26cm2w4 THINKING ABOUT EITHER LEARNING TO FIX A CAR AND MAINTAIN A HOME, OR OTHERWISE TO JUST MAKE GOOD MONEY<br/><br/>NOT SURE WHY THE OLD MAN ONLY SAW ONE OF THESE OPTIONS 2026-09-17T20:54:55Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsygwvn7a93x5qcjmk65eddfgst6pjmaxvw05ljn6h4hf2z5l8haggzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc255r743 IF I WANTED A SALAD, GUESS WHAT I WOULD EAT?<br/><br/>NOT A HAMBURGER, TACO, SANDWICH, OR BURRITO<br/><br/>#WHERESTHEBEEF 2026-09-17T20:53:03Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsd9a4s8433jsnhn05gyp3jyflq74egahsp48mfj5a852zjvt3dg8gzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2tqymxl I feel so special. My bank just called to inform me that I qualify for a bad financial decision. 2026-09-17T20:46:39Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsxwmkguqkrhzunw6d7de2tk4rufpfaplrv0xw6gvqt4m9sjtew42gzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2p9hdyd Don&#39;t tell anyone, but people in the Midwest are fighting over cheaply built development homes in suburban hell while thousands of miles of beachfront property remain unpopulated. 2026-09-17T20:44:38Z https://nostr.now/nevent1qqsraq4qv9w3ek8wc5y8nfc863agj7wng455m7jsems92f3gk0addtgzyq72v5wkj0lmeryv5pzdzp270qyh5fteuxr7f44v07klp82ht3dc2dv8rn3 learning to appreciate the annoyance of performative social over-conscientiousness as an alternative to self centered confidence games 2026-09-17T20:17:46Z