River J. Hopkins

Bestselling #Author of #SometimeAfterMidnight⭐ #Writer 📚 #Editor ✏️ #Musician 🎶 #Disabled ♿ #Gamer 🎮 An #ActualCyborg ⚙ She/Her/Hers ♀️✳ No DMs, please🚫

My latest series: #TheOutcrossedSeries; #IntoTheForgottenForest & #UnderTheWolfMoon

The game I run on here: #OfGhostsAndGods

My one person band: #Pseudonumb

Please send editing queries to river@riverjhopkins.com

Public Key

npub1nenxuyml2tdw2u3fef04qyumedztp6j9mn56pvm3n0ln5hd0mfps3dpr4d

NIP-05 Address

cyborg_writer@writing-exchange.mostr.pub

Profile Code

nprofile1qqsfuenwzdl49kh9wg5u5h6szwduk39safzae6dqkdcehle6tkha5scpz4mhxue69uhhyetvv9ujuerfw36x7tnsw43qzv9lej

Publishing to

relay.ditto.pub

Author Public Key

npub1nenxuyml2tdw2u3fef04qyumedztp6j9mn56pvm3n0ln5hd0mfps3dpr4d

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Last Notes

2026-10-26 19:25:04 UTC

I have had feelings for exactly three people in the past decade, and have been rejected by all of them.
I need to move somewhere where I can meet more people.
I can't keep being alone all day, every day.

2026-10-26 14:01:34 UTC

Finally figured out how to block Mattables on Twitch the other day!! 🥳

2026-10-24 23:50:15 UTC

Men feel comfortable crying around me and talking about their feelings, and I feel like that's probably a good thing.

2026-10-22 13:57:37 UTC

Somehow, my party was able to kill the captain of a slaver ship and most of the other slavers, then convince the pilots to surrender. WE STOLE A SPACESHIP, Y'ALL. AND WE'RE GONNA LIBERATE SOME SLAVES. Captain Eliza Rook is finally flying again!! Next session, we go to Mercury and shut the whole damn operation down, and I find my lost love.
#EclipsePhase

2026-10-19 14:53:18 UTC

I'm thinking, once again, of starting a new account here. I don't think there's a way I can change my username here, because I haven't found it, and I don't use cyborg_writer anywhere else now.

2026-10-18 17:18:37 UTC

I was trying to choose a comfort film to stream in my server last night, and my friend kept throwing suggestions at me and I kept trying to tell her I was choosing from a very specific list of films I find comforting, but she kept insisting she was finding me a new comfort film. When I finally just put a movie on, she understood. 😂

2026-10-17 16:27:13 UTC

Sometimes the way you show care is not the way someone wants to be cared for.

2026-10-17 13:58:06 UTC

I don't fucking get it. Why do people think I need saving?? When have I ever fucking been a damsel in distress?? I've ALWAYS handled my own shit and saved myself. If I need help, I'll ask for it.
In the words of Our Lady Ashnikko; "I'm a tough bitch, but I'm sensitive."

2026-10-17 09:49:01 UTC

Two of my closest friends really crossed a fucking line, and I'm feeling both angry and betrayed.

2026-10-16 12:10:53 UTC

I now have two people calling me their best friend. This never happens to me. I feel very loved.
One of them even confessed to have popped into Tom's stream the other night after he and I had that conversation. She didn't say anything bad. But I had to go back and watch the VOD. He did look a little nervous for a moment when she said she was there to put a face to a name and that she was my BFF. 😶

2026-10-15 21:37:31 UTC

I don't ever wanna feel like this again. Why did I let this happen AGAIN?? Maybe next time I'll just leave once those feelings start.

2026-10-15 15:09:59 UTC

I dunno if I can stream today. Or tomorrow. I am broken.

2026-10-15 09:01:39 UTC

Well, he doesn't feel the same way. But he does think of me as a friend. My heart hurts, but I'll be OK. I just have to stop thinking of him like that. Maybe I should cancel my streams until next week.

2026-10-14 18:16:02 UTC

The one day a week I wear eye makeup.
https://cdn.masto.host/writing/media_attachments/files/117/440/626/460/387/841/original/717fab954eaee197.jpg
https://cdn.masto.host/writing/media_attachments/files/117/440/626/612/261/951/original/e32133a016337c66.jpg

2026-10-14 15:57:21 UTC

Well, I told him.
Now I wait until he wakes up this afternoon and sees it. 😶😂

2026-10-13 09:53:24 UTC

Tom and I as napping raptors, then perching dragons! Lol. I had SO much fun tonight with him, Amy, and Nightwolf. 😊
Bonus: I was trying to tell Tom how much he was making his dragon look like mine, but he didn't notice. He goes, "Oh, we look very much alike!" when I landed. I think it's kinda cute. 😂🫶
https://cdn.masto.host/writing/media_attachments/files/117/432/981/182/799/015/original/a85fc3a7591186da.png
https://cdn.masto.host/writing/media_attachments/files/117/432/981/375/141/553/original/ed1e04d1b6252562.png

2026-10-12 07:53:06 UTC

I may not have told him my feelings yet, but he's in my server now. I don't know why, but I just don't feel in a rush to tell him. Like I somehow know things are gonna work out the way I hope they are or something.
Fuck you, negative voices!! I win.

2026-10-11 06:49:22 UTC

I didn't tell him.
I chickened out.
The negative voices won.
I currently hate myself.

2026-10-10 03:13:02 UTC

I think I'm gonna tell him tonight.

2026-10-09 08:17:44 UTC

Tonight he asked me if I wanted to watch one of his favorite shows with him because the other day I mentioned I hadn't seen it. 🥰

2026-10-08 16:34:50 UTC

I keep forgetting to post about it here! I'll be streaming today at 4PM EST!! Come hang out and we can SLAY THE PRINCESS together! 🫶
#twitch #twitchtv #gamergirl #river__rabbit #slaytheprincess
https://www.twitch.tv/river__rabbit

2026-10-07 05:25:17 UTC

I need to stop overbooking myself.
And I need to stop staying up so late on Tuesday nights in Tom's streams. But he's so...distracting. 😂🫣

2026-10-05 22:00:33 UTC

Friends to lovers over enemies to lovers, any day.

2026-10-05 13:50:04 UTC

Still looking!!! I really wanna fly out and see my dad and brothers before the end of the year, too.

2026-10-05 13:48:54 UTC

At the rate my subscribers list is growing on YouTube, I'm gonna have 2k followers this time next week.

2026-10-04 23:51:05 UTC

Gods help me, I'm watching a NASCAR race again with this man. But because he's not a dick, he's not making fun of me for not knowing anything about it. He's just explaining stuff as we watch. I have to leave soon for another thing I have already planned, and I almost don't want to go. I really like spending time with him. 😂

2026-10-04 01:51:35 UTC

They say everyone has a doppelganger. Mine is this Ancient Egyptian Death Mask hanging in the Louvre from an unnamed tomb.
https://cdn.masto.host/writing/media_attachments/files/117/380/122/287/194/554/original/cd39fc8c8cdf1b72.webp
https://cdn.masto.host/writing/media_attachments/files/117/380/132/406/045/581/original/5d070c94ddbec457.jpg

2026-10-04 01:38:14 UTC

Do I wait until I can get him alone on voice to tell him how I feel? Or do I message him about it? I feel like it would be better to speak about it, but at the same time...messaging would give him time to read, process, and think of how to reply.
What would you prefer, friends, if someone was confessing they had a crush on you?

2026-10-03 09:57:31 UTC

Going to sleep with a smile on my face, even though I'm only gonna get like four hours lol

2026-10-01 20:33:11 UTC

Looking to do a couple art commissions this month so I can afford a fun Halloween!! One of my recent pieces. I can do 4x4, 9x12, or full poster size (I forget the measurements, at the moment). Lemme know if you're interested!!
I do mostly animal busts, and mostly in grayscale watercolor and pen like this.
#artist #freelanceartist #artcommissions #artcommissionsopen
https://cdn.masto.host/writing/media_attachments/files/117/367/551/002/534/875/original/c61f381223912f06.jpg

2026-10-01 09:11:26 UTC

Tom was trying to find RABBIT pelts in-game, and I gasped. He said he was only buying them because he wasn't killing them...for me. That was what was implied. 😂💀

2026-09-30 20:12:18 UTC

TWITCH PARTY ON FRIDAY BECAUSE I GOT OVER 1K SUBS ON YOUTUBE!!!! 🤘🤘🤘🥳🥳🥳

2026-09-30 17:08:36 UTC

I think a lot of my fans are gonna be disappointed when I'm no longer single.
Sorry, ladies and gents...I have a weird feeling it's gonna happen soon. 😂

2026-09-30 12:59:39 UTC

I wonder if anyone ever sees me online and stresses out about whether or not to message me.

2026-09-30 04:23:29 UTC

Me: Be right back! Grabbing a snack!
Tom: Don't GET a snack; BE a snack.
😂💀

2026-09-30 04:21:24 UTC

"DUDE, WHERE'S MY CARP?"

2026-09-30 03:25:29 UTC

"WHAT HAVE I DONE?! AND WHY AM I INTO IT?!"
-Tom

2026-09-29 23:34:13 UTC

Why does everyone think I wanna be alone when I'm sad?? This is the time I LEAST want to be alone. 😭😭😭😭😭

2026-09-29 21:28:10 UTC

I need a partner who actually likes me and wants to talk to me and make plans with me. I need to wake up to like...ten cute texts from them because they kept thinking of things to tell me while I'm asleep. Or lose track of time because we've been talking all night.

2026-09-29 08:57:37 UTC

Oh wait...IS SHE FLIRTING WITH ME? 😳

2026-09-28 15:45:21 UTC

Streaming more Shadows Over Loathing later, and I made a new outfit for my PNGTuber just for the game!!

2026-09-26 23:54:39 UTC

By Monday morning, I will probably have 1000 followers on YouTube. This is insanity. One of my videos has over 8000 views.

2026-09-26 23:21:22 UTC

This has the LOWEST views of any of my shorts, for whatever reason. Why does no one wanna check out my girl boner? 😂💀
#river__rabbit #twitchtv #twitch #gamergirl #isaystupidshitsometimes
https://youtube.com/shorts/zvjLP_AP8tw

2026-09-24 23:55:40 UTC

WOW. I'M TOTALLY OVER THAT ASSHOLE.
My heart feels so much lighter.

2026-09-24 23:48:51 UTC

I bought a size medium jacket today that actually fit.
I have not been a size medium since like 1996.

2026-09-24 21:01:20 UTC

The only people who think sexuality is a choice are ones who are super deep in the closet and are in denial about it.

2026-09-24 16:06:47 UTC

MISCHIEF.
https://cdn.masto.host/writing/media_attachments/files/117/326/865/391/243/537/original/2aade99023e71128.jpg
https://cdn.masto.host/writing/media_attachments/files/117/326/865/578/271/645/original/09b055221a32da6c.jpg
https://cdn.masto.host/writing/media_attachments/files/117/326/865/762/842/042/original/7bbc0f637f6a9b82.jpg

2026-09-24 00:50:42 UTC

I need more people who aren't straight men in my Discord server. And I need more mods both there and on Twitch. I am having a not great time. The one mod I have is very busy and has not been able to help out lately. I'm very overwhelmed. 😭

2026-09-22 23:24:41 UTC

This game is fucking ridiculous, and it's giving me all sorts of nostalgia about Kingdom of Loathing and West of Loathing. I can't wait to stream more of it tomorrow!!!!!!
#shadowsoverloathing #twitch #twitchstreamer #twitchtv #river__rabbit #gamergirl
https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLb-r0-prayHk

2026-09-22 08:53:40 UTC

It's almost 5am.
I've been in voice chat with Tom for several hours now.
My face and stomach hurt from smiling and laughing.
Again...worth it. 🫠

2026-09-21 05:27:47 UTC

Channel trailer is live!
https://www.twitch.tv/videos/2879977175

2026-09-21 01:51:08 UTC

Uploaded six new ridiculous shorts today!!
#river__rabbit on #twitchtv | #twitch #gamergirl #adatewithdeath
https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLW2Uy2ns8tk8

2026-09-20 15:09:18 UTC

Oops. Lol.
https://youtube.com/shorts/loG0KwqW2Ok

2026-09-20 07:42:44 UTC

Stayed up far too late again hanging out with Tom in voice chat.
He makes my heart feel lighter than it has in months, so it was worth it. I'll just take a nap tomorrow at some point. 😂

2026-09-11 17:42:05 UTC

If I ever have long sleeves on, I will roll them up unless it's a coat. It's a subconscious thing. I guess I don't like my forearms being covered? I dunno 🤣

2026-09-11 17:08:18 UTC

No idea what I'm doing on stream today, but I'm starting at normal time (3PM EST). JOIN ME!!
#ruver__rabbit on #twitchtv | #twitch #gamergirl #twitchstreamer
https://www.twitch.tv/river__rabbit

2026-09-06 06:03:25 UTC

I hate to think that everything happens for a reason...but I DO think that everything is connected, and when bad things happen, the universe tries to balance it out.
Or maybe I'm the reason things are balancing out.
Maybe it's just because I'm...doing something right?
I'm making so many new, supportive, kind human beings, and supporting them right back.
I have several entirely new groups of friends now, and I wasn't expecting this at all.
My YT and TikToks are blowing up, too.

2026-09-03 07:56:59 UTC

Every time someone likes an old comment of mine on one of his posts, it's a dagger to the heart. I have been going to the video in question and deleting the comments. This last one was telling him how much I loved his laugh.
Just when I thought I was finally getting over this.
I need to sleep, but now I'm sobbing.

2026-09-02 07:28:17 UTC

Cute streamer kept talking to me even after I said goodbye. I think I must have said bye three times in three different ways. 😂

2026-09-02 01:06:47 UTC

Someone told me I'm their new favorite streamer tonight 😭🫶

2026-09-01 08:28:38 UTC

My famous actor friend said my voice would be perfect for voice acting. 😂😁
https://youtube.com/shorts/zjaE42orx4s

2026-08-30 17:42:12 UTC

Only 4 followers away from Twitch Affiliate now!!!
I'm so excited. I'm making all sorts of new friends and building a little community/support network. I should have done this sooner.
Please let me know if you'd like to be interviewed live sometime!!! I'm looking for authors, artists, musicians, actors, etc. Really any kind of creative thing you do and wanna talk about!! Let's chat. <3

2026-08-30 17:39:06 UTC

Instead of blocking him, outright, on TikTok, I just added "Mattables" to my list of muted words. His videos haven't been randomly popping up every time I open the app now. Huzzah!!!! 🥳 🥳 🥳

2026-08-29 18:45:28 UTC

Every time I think I'm better, I find another photo of him. Or someone likes an old comment I made on one of his posts.
I've been going and deleting those comments. Unfortunately, while I was doing that yesterday, I accidentally re-liked the post I was removing the comment from and immediately un-liked it again. I really hope he didn't see that. 😭

2026-08-29 09:18:57 UTC

This man sang to me three times tonight.
Gods help me. 😂😅

2026-08-28 21:59:16 UTC

I just need 9 more followers to become a Twitch Affiliate!!
Wanna help me out and become a part of a very silly community?
Please join us! I'll be streaming again on Tuesday. 🫶
#river__rabbit on #twitchtv | #twitchstreamer #twitch #gamergirl #chatty
https://www.twitch.tv/river__rabbit

2026-08-28 10:27:18 UTC

I might cancel stream today just to get some stuff done.

2026-08-28 07:14:36 UTC

Don't call people "wheelchair bound."
It's the disability that's binding.
Wheelchairs set them FREE.
(Speaking as someone who used to use multiple mobility aids)

2026-08-27 05:01:24 UTC

When you're really upset, do you ever find yourself just...holding your breath? Like, literally not breathing? For NO REASON??? It's really weird.

2026-08-26 05:55:16 UTC

One day, I'll find someone who loves like me.
I just wish it had happened sooner.

2026-08-25 07:13:07 UTC

Why would you call someone by their middle name if their first name is visible on-screen?
Do people think "River" is a title?? I don't understand 😂😭

2026-08-25 06:36:00 UTC

Starting stream later than usual today because I have not slept yet.
Come celebrate my half birthday with me at 12PM EST!! 🫶
#river__rabbit on #twitchtv | #twitch #twitchstreamer #gamergirl #adatewithdeath
https://www.twitch.tv/river__rabbit

2026-08-24 06:24:11 UTC

Show me your home screen!
https://cdn.masto.host/writing/media_attachments/files/117/149/037/833/807/118/original/9d5312e4612a6256.png

2026-08-24 00:02:47 UTC

I wonder if adding a little rainbow flag and "Omni/Demi" in my profile will attract new fans who aren't straight men. Not that I don't love the men, but...where are all the ladies and my fellow LBTQIA+s?!

2026-08-23 19:35:13 UTC

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@nprofile…hg0c Gorgeous!! I love it so much!

2026-08-23 17:10:32 UTC

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@nprofile…2udq Thank you! 🥳🥳🥳

2026-08-23 16:51:08 UTC

I posted four of my shorts on TikTok last night, and I woke up to HUNDREDS of views, and a bunch of likes and follows. I got a notification that I'm outperforming 90% of creators with similar content. I think I'm doing something right??!!

2026-08-22 18:42:21 UTC

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@nprofile…2udq I'm trying to! Haha. And yeah, I have this weird feeling like I'm gonna meet them soon, whoever they may be. Like this is how it happens in romcoms, isn't it? Broken-heart meets someone she wasn't expecting, wacky hijinks ensue, etc. lol

2026-08-22 18:33:32 UTC

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@nprofile…2udq Yeahhhh, I have had too many Narcs and sociopaths in my life. Istg, they're drawn to Neurodivergent people like moths to a flame...but only until they start to hate us.

2026-08-22 18:27:51 UTC

I mostly take people at their word, and I really shouldn't.
It's not worth the cognitive dissonance when I realize they are not who they said they were.
I have to remember to make sure peoples' words and actions align.
I'm not going to close off my heart again, but I'm going to be more cautious of who I let into my life. If I have a bad feeling about someone or where something is going, I need to trust it.

2026-08-22 17:28:53 UTC

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@nprofile…cm0q Sometimes for four hours, sometimes six, depending on how I'm feeling lol

2026-08-22 17:28:33 UTC

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@nprofile…cm0q That would be awesome!! I stream three times a week! Tuesdays at 7AM, Thursdays at Noon, and Fridays at 3PM. All Eastern Standard Time. 😃

2026-08-22 16:32:06 UTC

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@nprofile…2udq Thanks! And yeah, I am starting to feel more like myself. Much less crying lately.

2026-08-22 15:46:17 UTC

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@nprofile…2udq Understandable

2026-08-22 15:45:33 UTC

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@nprofile…cm0q Thank you so much!! 🫶

2026-08-22 15:36:12 UTC

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@nprofile…cm0q Here's the link!! 😊
https://www.youtube.com/@river__rabbit

2026-08-22 15:35:02 UTC

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@nprofile…2udq Ah, gotcha. How come you don't use any other social media? Just don't like it?

2026-08-22 15:33:40 UTC

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@nprofile…2udq It's more like I just don't wanna start over. I really wish I could just change my username. Cyborg_writer is such a...generic description. River__Rabbit is more me.

2026-08-22 07:15:08 UTC

My new YouTube channel has had 2,173 views already. I'm really proud of myself. I think I'm doing something right! Whatever it is!!

2026-08-22 04:43:50 UTC

Trying to get over the fact that Matt talks so much about authenticity and talking your problems out with people...but he doesn't practice what he preaches. He's a coward and a fake, and I'm better off without someone like that in my life. Even if it still hurts like a fresh wound. It hurts more that I lost a bunch of people in that community I could've actually called friends. Just...gone forever because he was too chickenshit to talk to me about things that bothered him. He's cruel.

2026-08-22 04:24:42 UTC

I was gonna make a new account with a different username here and delete this one, but...meh.

2026-08-22 01:29:10 UTC

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@nprofile…2udq What rules? Lol. Say hi next time! I still need more followers to get to affiliate, so a follow is always helpful.

2026-08-21 19:31:16 UTC

I'm live now!! Please come hang out 🫶
#river__rabbit on #twitchtv | #twitch #gaming #gamer #gamergirl #oxenfreeplaythrough #oxenfree
https://www.twitch.tv/river__rabbit

2026-08-21 18:26:02 UTC

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@nprofile…2udq It's a lot of fun! I don't usually allow myself to game for more than an hour at a time because I don't feel productive, but...since I'm getting paid to stream (when people sub and throw bits at me, anyway), it feels like I AM being productive lol

2026-08-21 18:11:23 UTC

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@nprofile…2udq Thanks!! I hope some people show up to hang out with me in chat

2026-08-21 17:55:33 UTC

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@nprofile…2udq I think streaming today will help. I'll be live in about an hour!

2026-08-21 17:44:54 UTC

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@nprofile…k9k3 It's the WORST 😭

2026-08-21 17:43:50 UTC

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@nprofile…2udq Nope. I feel like I didn't sleep at all.

2026-08-21 17:26:49 UTC

I slept on and off for 12, nightmare-filled hours.

2026-08-20 06:26:49 UTC

During my VOD edits, I've been adding in little bits of text and GIFs here and there, roasting myself. 😂