Your situation is actually quite different than our friend's husband is, then. I'm sorry for your troubles, but the man you referenced has worked hard to build the life that he has.
One of the reasons I follow NorcalGma is my admiration for her positivity and her resolve. Sentiments from people like you and I can actually have a harmful impact on her. Because I care for her, I seek only to build her up.
Please, give that a try. 🌸