The Witchy Bitches on Nostr: It's a Sisyphus kind of day. Sisyphus is the guy in Greek mythology who managed to ...

It's a Sisyphus kind of day. Sisyphus is the guy in Greek mythology who managed to trick/annoy so many Gods that upon his death he was forced to roll a rock up a hill forever or face being crushed. When he would get his rock to the top, they would reappear at the bottom again. And thats what lung disease is like. You have to breathe to live, if you can't breathe, every other task becomes harder. If I'm to function I need to be able to walk and move under my own power while breathing. I exercise every day, but when i get an exaserbation or pneumonia then it's like all that work I put into exercising and keeping myself well and working to improve or at least maintain my limited lung capacity has disappeared and I'm back at the bottom of the hill again with my rock, trying to push so I don't get crushed and things like emptying the dryer or doing a 30 minute workout leave me gasping and trembling on the floor ... Going to bed and staying there for the next 2 weeks sounds wonderful. But i am going back to work on 5 January I need to be able to walk 2-3 blocks each way whenever I leave or enter a school. So I can't just lay around because if I'm going to be functional at work I need to keep pushing and pushing but it is so fucking exhausting and discouraging when the simplest things make my lips turn blue. Anyway we can see that I'm starting my day with my very own whine and cheese party. Yikes! But I got 16 minute miles in my workout it was hard and awful and I hated every stupid, sweaty, blue-lipped second. But it's also the thing I need to be doing if I don't want to lose even more stamina. Ugh! If you made it this far you deserve a cookie.