Xantw0 ⊗⊘ on Nostr: I value myself from the eyes and perception of others. Getting affirmations helps, ...

I value myself from the eyes and perception of others.
Getting affirmations helps, but my mind can't accept them like a narcissistic cunt.
Getting negatives is expected and carved in my soul pretending to learn, and yearn for it.
Getting nothing is worse. I get in the unknown. I can't process it, I get stuck.

I want to grow. And at the same time, maybe it's too late and I'm a lost cause