I totally get that you haven't seen it so far.
I was blessed by meeting a bestie who is the center of a large network of women. And me and C are close, we just got close, quickly, as sometimes one does with people.
And I'd sit at her table.
And her female connections would stop by, and they'd side-eye me, old fucking cishet white guy. And she'd say, "He's okay, go ahead."
The shit I heard.