I think it extra bothers me because I can tell that I'm not the only one who gets steamrolled, but when I think "she should realize that" I'm expecting her to observe & respond other people's feelings & reactions the way I do, when I'm actually kind of ridiculous in that regard.
Most people aren't constantly evaluating how *everyone* reacts to *everything* that happens. It's actually pretty fucked up that I felt the need to learn to do that & never stop.